In her own words ... a mother's story.
Hello, my name is Sammie. Let me give you a little information about my family and myself. I have been married since 1985 to a wonderful man, father, and provider. We have three wonderful daughters: Teri, a college sophomore, Jen, and Megan who are both 16 (yes, double trouble). Actually, that is not true; they are wonderful daughters who will be high school juniors in an honors program. They both rank within the top 50 students in their class and both are perfectionists. As a parent I couldn't be prouder.
Jen and Megan get along wonderfully 75% of the time. The other 25% of the time is spent trying to be individuals. I watched this go on all their lives and tried to help them as much as I could. They both have the same circle of friends and as much as they want to be separate from each other, they want to spend time together. As they have gotten older, the conflicts between the two have increased in episodes and intensity.
"There is also a power struggle going on -
who can push the most buttons on whom to hurt each other the most."
I have always heard that there is a thin line between love and hate and I am afraid that I have seen it between Jen and Megan. There is also a power struggle going on - who can push the most buttons on whom to hurt each other the most. In the end they both are hurt and emotionally damaged. The day that I heard them say how much they hated each other, I knew I was in way over my head and in need of outside help. I was totally scared and didn't know where to turn. Physical wounds are easier fixed than what was going on inside their heads.
My husband did not want me to seek professional help, worrying that seeing a doctor would scar them in some way. Here is where my conflict began. Not having his support in this matter, I turned to my co-workers for help. GOD works in mysterious ways!!!
One of my co-workers, Debbie Gutraj, talked with me several times about Jen and Megan and felt that she might be able to help me. Debbie put me in touch with Therese Galvan who, after hearing my story, put me in touch with Tarne Mixson.
I had a wonderful conversation with Tarne and saw a light at the end of my tunnel. Tarne agreed to see Jen and Megan at a light-hearted location. The first meeting with Tarne was with Jen, Megan and myself. Tarne was wonderful and I knew that my girls were in the right hands. Tarne meets with Jen and Megan together for now, but eventually they will meet separately. We agreed to keep things between them unless Tarne felt that someone was in danger or needed help she could not give, then I would be contacted.
"How peaceful I feel knowing that Jen and Megan
will have coping skills due to the all the help they are receiving..."
I know that the girls still have work ahead of them; and they will keep seeing Tarne while they are in high school and before college starts. I feel at peace knowing that Jen and Megan will have coping skills due to the help they are receiving - which I could never fully give.
How can I thank the people who God put in my life to help not only myself, but two young women just starting their own lives? Hopefully, Jen, Megan or I will be able to help some else who needs guidance in their own life.
* Names changed to maintain confidentiality.
